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Jul 21, 17

Cleveland, OH: J15 Report Back on CPD, III%er, and Alt-Right Activity

On July 15th, a constellation of grassroots activist organizations converged on Willard Park in downtown Cleveland to rally and march in support of the impeachment of the 45th POTUS. They were met by a contingent of III% militia carrying assault rifles, and wearing desert camo.

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Local news crews interviewed the threepers as they patrolled the park. One militiaman dramatically picked up a discarded Mountain Dew bottle and exclaimed to the journalists that “protesters could potentially make a bomb out of this.”  Dear readers, we wish we were joking.

The rally itself was intersectional, with members of the Muslim, anarchist, African-American, LGBTQIA, progressive, and disabled community speaking and/or participating in the march. [Note, the July 15th mobilizations were organized by, a front group for the Revolutionary Communist Party (RCP).]

We made sure to tell everyone at the protest about the ‘Second Battle of Gettysburg,’ much to the militia’s disappointment. There was much denial from threepers that they were present at Gettysburg and they hotly refuted that the thigh in question belonged to a militiaman at all. That may have placated the sheer terror of many of the liberal protesters, except these assholes kept lazily pointing the barrels of their rifles at members of the march. One middle aged woman at the march was a responsible gun owner, and had a visible shit fit at the lack of basic safety practice.

McKenzie R. Levindofske, who also goes by “Stella Sader”, “McKenzie Levi”, “The Cleveland Alt-Knight”, “Spitty McGhee” showed up in his full crusader accoutrement.  He’s well known to the activist community for hocking loogies on protesters, and for targeting women and Muslims specifically for lengthy tirades and menacing physical behavior.

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The march was over policed, as is always the case in Cleveland. CPD never misses an opportunity to use their shiny RNC bikes and riot gear.

After several speakers from the community gave speeches, folks began their march from Willard Park to Public Square. As the march got closer to the Square, it became apparent that CPD was kettling the march away from the targeted destination. Leaders of the march attempted to reason with the police to allow them access to Public Square. The police maintained that a “Private Event” was happening at Public Square, and continued blocking access.

After much negotiation by the organizers, the march was finally permitted to move around Public Square. There were many high fives and encouraging comments from bystanders throughout the whole route. As we wound back toward our starting point, the march encountered an African drum line performing on a street corner.  We elected to hold an impromptu dance party with them, because this is Cleveland, we’re fun folks and we like to have a good time.

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We approached Willard Park, and a swath of folks at the front of the march was almost bowled over by CPD on bikes. The police had spotted 3 racists holding confederate flags standing just east of the park. The cops huddled around them forming a protective barrier.

Things the cops thought were a threat to public safety:

Trump protesters

Things the cops thought were NOT a threat to public safety:

Assault Rifle Wielding LARPers

Deranged Spitter in Chain Mail

The march and rally were well received by the community, and considered successful by organizers. In the aftermath of the event, III%ers continue to send messages to local liberal organizers alleging “libel” due to community members’ complaints about their lack of gun safety. They also continue to loudly exclaim in messages that THEY TOTALLY DON’T KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT GETTYSBURG LIKE SERIOUSLY.  So to all those organizers out there reading this, if militias show up at your event, feel free to ride ‘The Second Battle of Gettysburg’ like it’s goddamn Seabiscuit.

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The LOL%ers.

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